Begrimed: I was laughing at something in that picture, but I forget what.
Ivan: Probably when you sat down on that cucumber.
Begrimed: Oh! Yeah.
Begrimed: That was it.
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Ivan: God.
Ivan: I go to take a bath, and come back to ten messages from you.
Ivan: Only like, two of which had any point whatsoever.
Begrimed: Oh. Yeah.
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Ivan: Good thing I started playing "Cool Spot" a few minutes ago, or else I might've not reacted so coolly.
Ivan: I'm 66% cool.
Begrimed: That's a lie.
Ivan: You're a lie.
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Ivan: I'm confident about my wang.
Ivan: It's stuck through thick and thin my whole life.
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Ivan: It looks like an ink bottle commited suicide, after killing another ink bottle.
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Ivan: This kid was in a chat with me and three other girls, and he just would not shut up.
Ivan: I kept dropping hints and insults on him every so often, and eventually we broke into a fight.
Ivan: Then, halfway through, he said the most random, unbelievable thing.
Ivan: He just goes, "I had to watch my father get killed by a hitman."
Begrimed: Uh.
Ivan: It was ridiculous when he explained it.
Ivan: Apparently, there was a hit out on his father for no reason, and somebody broke in. He said his father was "kidnapped"... but taken to their basement. His mom found out, then called the cops while he and his father were tied down in the basement. The guy shot his dad, and was going to shoot him, but LUCKILY, the cops got in and managed to take him down before he could pull the trigger.
Ivan: The kidnapper's on death row in prison, but they're going to allow him to kill the guy himself.
Ivan: With a katana.
Ivan: Because he's Japanese. But he lives in Pennsylvania.
Begrimed: Holy crap.
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Ivan: I've been wearing this sex bracelet I was given a few days ago for, like, a few days.
Ivan: I bathed with it and everything.
Begrimed: What is a sex bracelet?
Ivan: They're these little... bracelets.
Begrimed: Oh, good.
Begrimed: I was worried you were gonna be vague.
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Ivan: I hate it when people refer to things as "the one we know and love."
Ivan: Except when they mean me.
Ivan: Which never happens.
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Begrimed: I'm in the mood to do something... nice for someone.
Ivan: *Unzips pants.*
Begrimed: You have until the count of don't fuck with me to put that snake back in its pen before I douse it with gasoline and throw a lit match at its face.
Ivan: That gives me practically 0 seconds.
Begrimed: Yeah.
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Begrimed: I had a very interesting dream.
Ivan: Shoot.
Begrimed: I saw colors that didn't exist; images that could by no means be placed into the spectrum of color that we know of.
Ivan: I should just punch you in the face right now.
Begrimed: Why's that?
Ivan: That's going to be on my mind all night.
Begrimed: Ha.
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Ivan: I hate carpets, and of course I live in a house with a white carpet.
Ivan: Figures too, 'cause I'm all clumsy with food.
Ivan: "Hey, Nick! We just put in a brand new white carpet."
Ivan: "Hold on a second, I'm getting some of this grape pie."
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Begrimed: I love having ideas, because they'll usually have sex with other ideas I've had and create new ones.
Ivan: Yeah.
Ivan: That's a pretty weird analogy, but it works.
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Begrimed: A penny can hide the largest star in the universe, if you hold it close enough to your eye.
Ivan: No shit.
Ivan: Stars are pretty far away, most of the time.
Begrimed: 'Most of the time'? When's the last time a fucking STAR came just miles from grazing the Earth's atmosphere and wiping us out?
Ivan: :[
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Ivan: This girl asked if "blue ball" was a disease in health class.
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Begrimed: I've got the perfect beat in mind for the techno portion, too.
Ivan: Thoomp thoomp thoomp thoomp thoomp?
Begrimed: How did you know?
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Ivan: I don't even remember what happened while I was grounded.
Ivan: Lots of sleeping, and GameCube.
Begrimed: A haze of nonline time.
Ivan: Nonline? Part of me would like to think that's clever, but another just wants to say... no.
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Begrimed: It was one of those dumps that felt like a twelve-man fleet armed with a battering ram charged directly into my sphincter at great velocity.
Duopierce: ...
Duopierce: I didn't ask to hear the story of Red October.
Begrimed: Hey, Red October was a great story.
Duopierce: And you related it to your rectum.
Begrimed: That only made it better.
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Duopierce: Remember the jumbled staff we had when you first joined?
Begrimed: HAHAHAHAHAHA.
Begrimed: ^ -- there's your answer.
Begrimed: Well, my answer.
Begrimed: To your question.
Begrimed: It's the answer I'm giving to you.
Begrimed: So it's your answer, now.
Begrimed: But formerly my answer.
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Duopierce: What I hate is how the first half of the Broli movie has all this plot build up with dialogue and stuff.
Duopierce: Then, all at once...
Duopierce: It's when Broli first yells, mind you.
Duopierce: You can pinpiont the moment, and BAM... the movie sucks.
Begrimed: Haha.
Begrimed: Yeah.
Begrimed: It started out as an awesome movie.
Begrimed: It had a lot of thought going into it and EVERYTHING.
Begrimed: Then it was like...
Begrimed: A Sonic the Hedgehog level.
Begrimed: ACT 1: KICK ASS ZONE
Begrimed: ACT 2: SUCK ASS ZONE
Duopierce: What's the boss fight called?
Begrimed: You don't fight a boss.
Begrimed: You jump on the lid of Eggman's capsules, but instead of freeing a bunch of animals, you free a bunch of people who were forced to sit through the movie to avoid coming off as rude to their friends.
Begrimed: It could have had a much more creative ending.
Begrimed: Not... GIMME UR POWER GUYS.
Begrimed: U 2, VEGETA
Begrimed: SERIOUSLY, VEGETA
Begrimed: I NEED IT
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Aero: This was worse.
Begrimed: Well, what is it?
Aero: It was a sort of goatse guy.
Aero: He was fisting himself. His hand was pretty deep in.
Aero: And he had a dildo.
Begrimed: Yawn.
Aero: Up his pisshole.
Begrimed: ... un-yawn.
Aero: Lmao.
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Aero: I just almost stabbed my own eye out.
Begrimed: I think I'm required by law to ask what happened, so, spill.
Aero: I was walking up the stairs with both a big bottle of Coke, and in the same hand, the knife. So I almost tripped because of being so clumsy, and when I looked up, the knife was but a few millimetres away from my eye.
Begrimed: That's certainly an odd combination of things to take upstairs with you. "I think I'll grab the Coke and... a knife!"
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Aero: There are naked women dancing somewhere in the world, and here we are talking about poo.
Begrimed: And somewhere else in the world, a man is tied to the bed with a naked woman taking a poo on his nose.
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Begrimed: I should acquire this doucebag's pass and delete his site, then replace it with a redirection to mine.
Aero: Hmm? Nah. That's a bit severe.
Begrimed: !
Begrimed: He took one of the images you made, too.
Aero: DO IT.
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Aero: Photoshop sucks.
Aero: You never look at images the way you used to.
Aero: You always go like "THAT PIXEL ISN'T RIGHT".
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Muse: Oh, that's a good one. If life were a comic strip and everything was written in.
Begrimed: Yeah.
Muse: My thought bubbles would have more diagrams than text.
Begrimed: Mine would have little pictures of weird shit that oddly relate to the situation going on.
Begrimed: On the surface, I'd be getting ripped off for $20. In my thought bubble, there'd be a picture of a caveman murdering a guy in a business suit with a flaming blunt object.
Muse: That's a waste of a perfectly good business suit. At least knock him out, take the suit, and then beat him with a flaming blunt object, that way you get the violence -and- new clothes!
Begrimed: No way. I wouldn't want to get beaten up by the next caveman.
Muse: Who said you'd have to keep it? Business suits are costly things and you can hawk 'em for a good price.
Begrimed: I like the way you think.
Begrimed: Too bad all of that is restricted to thought and any profit I made would be purely imaginary.
Muse: It's the circle of life, only it's less of a circle and more of a Möbius strip.
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Muse: I always laughed at the fact that Hermes was the god of Theives and merchants.
Begrimed: That's an odd thing to god over, for sure.
Muse: He did more than that.
Muse: but it just tickled me that he was for BOTH.
Begrimed: Reminds me a lot of the U.S Government.
Muse: If we start drawing paralells between the US Govt and Rome/Roman mythology we'll be up till 2025
Begrimed: I'm down. You down?
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Begrimed: I'm an electronic CONNOISSEUR.
Muse: or whore
Muse: one of the two
Begrimed: Connoisseur just sounds fancier.
Begrimed: In the end, you're still swishing something around in your mouth and spitting it out.
Muse: Don't forget to gargle
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Begrimed: I pissed off a mountain once. I know these things.
Muse: Wait, wait, -wait-.
Muse: you STOOD on a mountain and pissed
Muse: OR
Muse: Did you make a mountain ANGRY?
Begrimed: I made it angry.
Muse: How?
Begrimed: By pissing off of it.
Muse: *snicker*
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Muse: You think...you think my computer might have been a terrorist?
Begrimed: There's... a very high possibility that your machine may have been involved in terrorist activity.
Muse: Butbutbut it was such a sweet and quiet computer, it never hurt anyone and always did what it was told!
Begrimed: Well, it's the quiet ones you've sometimes gotta watch. Evil can take on any form.
Muse: You don't mean that, you, you're just RACIST!
Begrimed: My son was KILLED by a terrorist PC! YOU DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT THE DANGER YOU WERE JUST IN.
Muse: Well your son was probably just as much of a racist as you are! You're like all those heathens my computer told me about! Capitalist pigs that try to police the world, he never did anythign to you!
Begrimed: MY SON WAS A PC.
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Derek: I did 37 shots in one night, once.
Derek: I also fell through a window.
Derek: So... I don't know how well that counts.
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Derek: Man. I think Johnny Cash was one of the 4 horsemen of the apocolypse.
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Windmill Still: No. I hate Indians.
Windmill Still: They killed my father, and raped my mother.
rsdur: Sorry for the incident. But every indian will not be the same
Begrimed: Indians give great haircuts.
Windmill Still: It was an entire country of Indians that did it.
Begrimed: Yeah.
Begrimed: He's telling the truth.
Begrimed: I saw it happen.
Begrimed: They were lined up for miles.
Windmill Still: Seriously.
Windmill Still: We've got footage, mayn.
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Zeo_the_cat_boy: hentai yaoi and yuri is a discrace to anime and if you like it your a sick perverted ass ball who cant look at real porn because they dont go outside
Begrimed: What does looking at porn have to do with going outside, Zeo?
Begrimed: Unless you like animal porn.
Lana.Lane: .......
Zeo_the_cat_boy: what...
Revan: hahahaha
Uchiha Itachi: lmao
Zeo_the_cat_boy: fuck of cock bite!
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Nole: it was once my duty to guard the gates of heaven.... only myself could open the pearl gates........
HeAvEn: i have a gate? thats freakin awesome
Begrimed: You have many things, Heaven.
Begrimed: Everybody wants to get inside of you.
HeAvEn: i know thats weird
HeAvEn: people askin me if i know god
Hate You: Do you know God?
HeAvEn: and then i tell them im buddhist and they like burst into flames
Hate You: lmao.
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Begrimed: (Do you think he knows I'm just bullshitting him, guys?)
Hate You: (I think he does now.)
Chance: (( Who knows...))
Begrimed: (By the way, Eric, These parenthesis make my text invisible. You can't see what I'm saying.)
Yuki: lmao
Hate You: (]-Cracks up.-[)
ericcartmansp: you guys are seriously wierd
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Seed Giver: Hi Begrimed. Do you like kids?
Begrimed: Not particularely.
Seed Giver: Aha! yet another irresponsible person! :P
Seed Giver: Those that like children are responsible.
Seed Giver: those that dont or arn't ready for kids are pathetic.
keisuke_yazama: Depends. Those that don't want kids usually wear condoms, which is being responsible.
keisuke_yazama: So...
keisuke_yazama: Your logic fails.
Seed Giver: Wrong!
Seed Giver: Cause condoms just say "I'm a lazy fuck" which in term says "I can't deal with kids or maturity"
Seed Giver: So :P
Begrimed: OR. Some simply don't want to procreate.
Begrimed: Also, it takes more effort to put the condom on. Sometimes a tremendous amount of effort. There's nothing lazy or irresponsible about that.
Seed Giver: geeze..
Seed Giver: you ppl that can't accept kids are pathetic.
Begrimed: I don't believe it. I'm being told that I'm pathetic and irresponsible by a guy roleplaying a hermaphrodite in an anime chatroom.
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